July 9, 2007
At the end of the day, I try to answer several questions before I say my evening prayers.
Was I the reason of someone’s happiness? Or did I anger, frustrate, malign, unjustly treat or hurt a friend, subordinate, colleague or stranger? Did I do God’s will?
Then I mentally rack up my “score,” and most often, offer my repentance.
After prayers of my childhood days, I then lay my head upon the pillow of Hubby, all nice and fluffy with down feathers, and sleep on his side of the bed.
Dr. Albert Atiliano, whom I met last week at the taping of my show “Dee’s Day” with his cardiologist colleagues Dr. Adolfo Bellosillo, Dr. Ken Villanueva and Dr. Valencia sent me this angel thought.
It’s an inspiring spiritual version of the Golden Rule and the need to share God with others in our daily lives.
*****
Now for other matters… I had a long cellphone talk (actually it was more of a one-way conversation as I listened and she talked) with screen legend, Amalia Fuentes, a.k.a Nena Mulach, the other day.
And wow, did I get an earful about her shattered marriage and her estranged husband, ex-champion golfer Joey Stevens.
I told her I thoroughly enjoyed her long and candid interview (not in this paper) about her discovery that while she was away in America, Joey had been openly flaunting his amorous relationship with a 50-something Cebuana with two children and an ex-Italian spouse.
“Betrayal!” she hollered in my ear. “He betrayed my trust, my 28 years of faithfulness to him! He did not show any respect for me.”
Amalia and Joey were married in the US on Aug. 2, 1972 and she was committed to making their marriage work.
She willingly became a housewife, learning how to keep house and cook and attending to her investments which have grown, by dint of her hard work and business sense.
What really rankles her and other women in similar circumstances (giving the best of their years to their spouses who they thought would reciprocate in similar fashion) is the betrayal of trust. And shouldn’t they not be?
Amalia is a woman scorned and she isn’t taking it quietly. While she admitted that she forgave Joey for past “flings,” she doesn’t want to do so with this shameless Cebu affair which Stevens himself admitted.
I guess this is true of most scorned wives — they can turn a blind eye or even tolerate a playboy husband with his one-night stands or casual flings but not a serious affair.
She recalled Joey’s attempted fling with a beautiful society “companion” of a media tycoon some years ago before he died of cancer. The woman apparently just wanted to string him along because she called up Amalia and told her about it!
Amalia can’t be “shut up” by anyone, least of all her now contrite spouse. He no longer stays in the conjugal home because Amalia “can’t stand him anymore!”
As a backgrounder, Joey divorced his first wife Maria Olondriz, and later courted in earnest the beauteous Amalia, then having her tumultuous marriage to actor Romeo “Bobby” Vasquez annulled.
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“We were three in that marriage (with Bobby) and our bed was over-crowded,” she told me matter-of-factly.
Theirs was a fairy tale courtship-wedding which their millions of fans lapped up like honey. Filmdom’s most popular love team ending on the altar was the stuff of fans and entertainment reporters’ dreams.
Amalia had Liezel, now married to actor Albert Martinez, but after two years, her world fell apart with the discovery of the “other woman.”
Like Princess Diana, Amalia married her “Prince Charming” for love. Like the ill-fated Diana, she also discovered that he was a frog, not the prince she dreamt of.
“I did not want to go through all the nightmare and the hurts I had with Bobby so I only said “yes” to Joey after he had divorced his first wife and I was sure I was not hurting anyone.”
And now this mental torture and anguish… at 67, she is, ahhhh, “fat” by her own admission (from her cooking for her husband ) but she is grimly determined to lose weight.
“Not for him anymore, ” she bellowed. “This is for me. I want to look good for me. As Garfield (the loveable, sassy , overweight cat cartoon character of Jim Davis ) says ‘I’m fat but I can always lose weight. You’re ugly, what can you do about it?’”
And will she get even with Joey? “No. As Ivan Trump said, ‘Don’t get even, get everything!’”
And this includes her beloved son Gerard, now a law proper student at the Ateneo de Manila.
Amalia has embarked on a “crusade” to help draw attention to the mental and emotional costs of a marriage that has hit the rocks because of the husband’s philandering ways.
“Why should wives take the emotional battering all the time and the husbands go scot free?”
Yes, why indeed? When husbands play around, the wives are the ones who are in shock and whose lives end with the discovery of the cheating and the deceit.
The philanderers may, as Joey did, say sorry but the costs of the deception may be so high, that many wives cannot accept them back.
“I’ll say sorry and bring her flowers or send her abroad on a cruise or shopping spree and my wife will forgive me.” Sounds familiar?
Well, that won’t work with me anymore, Amalia stressed.
She intends to exact her “pound of flesh,” and get spousal support, lose weight to look stunning and beautiful again and enjoy her freedom “to the max!”
Discarded wives, unite! You have nothing to lose by your “derelict and viagra-king husbands” who think they are still desireable even if they are already fossils!
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